Guilfest 2004: Saturday

Saturday and on the main stage the wobble-boarding wierdness of  Rolf Harris wings his way over, a man who mysteriously seems to have become more of a cult figure with every passing year - must be all that pet whispering. We witness the added amusement of seeing those battle hardened and tattooed Damned fans waving their arms in the air, singing along to 'Two Little Boys', all misty eyed and missing their mums.

However a million angels must have descended into Dante's hell when Rolf sang one of rock's greatest classics 'Stairway to Heaven'. OK so there's a lot of people out there who love to kneel deep in the novelty but there's a line over which lies simple annoyance.

Nevertheless, despite our Miltonic angst on the issue, the man is a consummate professional, a septuagenarian who not only gets people eating out the palm of his hand but even getting them licked clean. To see this in action you have to be there to see the thousands singing 'Court Of King Caractacus'

Rickie Lee Jones (nuff said) and Kate Melua follow. Kate's riding high on the success of the impressive 'Call Off The Search' and 'Closest Thing To Crazy'. She smothers her audience with a cool Smoothsounds/JazzFM performance, that's just a bit too fragile for the main stage and we can't help but feel that if organisers had evicted the denizens of the Tropical Tent she could have sang like an Eva Cassidy nightingale to a select and more appreciative audience.

It's interesting that The Levellers (who get us swinging with a brilliant rendition of 'What A Beautiful Day') only make it to The Uncut Stage while Melua appears on the main stage warming up the mike for Jim Kerr. Never a great fan of Simple Minds, and, true to form, their bombastic pompous stadium rock in a field in Guildford doesn't do them justice. In addition, they're just too serious for their own good - look around Jim, check out the little kids getting down to your sound! Their set becomes a workmanlike but edgy electronic show, lapped up by a nostalgic crowd reminiscing of old times and satisfied by their greatest hits set, which includes  'Waterfront', 'Don't You Forget about Me', and 'Belfast Child', apparently the second longest number one after 'Hey Jude' pop-pickers.

With such a wide range of music of all styles and ages there's always going to a few hairy moments, but heck isn't that the beauty of going to a festival? There's always something round the corner even if it's someone clearing their throat at WOMAD, so the distress caused by balladeer and ex-Ultravox vocalist Midge Ure banging out 'Vienna' on an acoustic guitar sends us hot footing it to the Uncut Stage to see Essex rockers Eddie And The Hot Rods -  not exactly Canvey Island's finest but the nearest we're going to get outside of the upcoming 'Rockinbeerfest' at Huntingdon Racecourse.